


Someone to Talk to

by KarainRed (orphan_account)



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-18
Updated: 2013-11-18
Packaged: 2018-01-01 23:20:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 613
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1049776
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/KarainRed
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There was a limited pool of people who Levi considered himself close enough to that he was willing to unload his stresses on them during the time off between expeditions.</p><p>Levi could count them all on his fingers.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Someone to Talk to

**Author's Note:**

> Unbeta'd and written within ten minutes of waking up, so I apologize for any problems there may be in flow or grammar.

"I'm not qualified for this, Levi," Mike remarked as he looked down at the steaming mug placed on one corner of his desk. "Wouldn't Hanji be a better choice?" He held one hand over the steam, feeling the warmth spread around his hand.

"I just need someone to listen. I don't need a psychoanalysis."

Levi pressed his back into the window frame as he sat with his knees bent in front of him. Though the headquarters was overall warmer than the outside, there was a chill being so near to the outside, separated only by a thin layer of glass that was already lightly frosted over, fogged where the frost didn't reach and in general hindering any view of the outside landscape. He didn't need to see to know what was going out there; he had ears, and there was no attempt to muffle the voices raised in glee outside.

"I'll listen until the cocoa goes cold." Mike rested his hands on either side of the mug, feeling the warmth that leached through the ceramic.

Staring out the window's blurred surface, Levi began to speak.

"I know it's a dream, but I can never wake up. I'm in a forest. The trees tower over me, and there is this mist that hangs over everything. It's fucking _dark_. I can't... feel anything, but I know that it's cold and wet too. And I can't hear anything. I can't hear my own footsteps, I can't hear my gear, and when I tried to speak..."

"You can't hear your voice either?" Levi made a short noise of irritation, closing his eyes as his forehead pressed against the chilled glass. "How long have you been having this dream?"

"It's been a week, I think, since I've actually gotten a full night of sleep-" ("You never get a full night of sleep," Mike argued, but Levi ignored that.) "But... It was different last night.

"The wind was whistling through the trees before I even tried using my gear, and the cold cut through me, cut straight to the bone. Once I was off the ground, I felt like I had somewhere I needed to be. I felt vulnerable as hell, but I wasn't running away from something. I was running toward something.

"I heard a scream, and I woke up." For a few moments, Levi was silent. Lifting his hand, he began to draw upon the window with one fingertip. The silence extended between them until Levi finally spoke again. "It was me. The scream." From what he was told, it was a scream of terror that choked off in his throat as he startled himself awake.

"I know I'm going to see them, one of these days. It isn't as though I haven't seen their bodies already, and I know it's coming so it isn't like I'm going to be surprised, but... I'm terrified."

Again there was silence. Levi stretched his legs out, feeling as though a weight had been lifted off of his chest. "Thanks for listening," he commented. When he looked over at the mug sitting on the desk, steam no longer rose above the rim. Levi stood up and walked over to it. "But it was coffee, you prick." Already he was rebuilding the distant facade he showed to the soldiers as he picked up the mug and took a deep swig from its contents. "You getting a cold?"

The cold coffee was black and bitter; Levi could never make it right, and eventually he had given up trying to. He left the office without another word, leaving it pristine even though it hadn't been touched in weeks.

Loneliness did things to a person.


End file.
